Sunday, March 16, 2014

an empty shell.

we drove up to our house last night after a 14 hour drive...exhausted, refreshed, excited to be home, and ready to go back all at the same time.

being a lover of the ocean is something that seems to be innate in me. if asked about my dreams, living seaside has always been at the top of the list. and hands down, every time, if asked the whole beach vs. mountains question, my answer is the beach. without a moments hesitation. i fully love the mountains and actually lived in Colorado for a time, but when it comes to the natural pull of my heart, the beach always wins.

i don't even know if i can put a finger on the exact reasons why. it could be way the ocean waves kiss the sandy shore time after time, soothing all fears and worries that my heart may hold. i'm sure it has something to do with the warmth of the sun on my skin that completely melts any insecurities. or the security i feel when my feet sink into the gentle sand and my mind goes to all the thoughts that God must think about me. i know it has something to do with the endless possibilities that the horizon beckons me into...with its faithful sunrises and sunsets that leave me breathless. i feel as if anything is possible and that chasing my dreams is the only option. it could be the childlike giddiness that rises up in me...the simple pleasure that can't be snuffed out when walking along the waters edge...the playfulness that playing in the sand demands. i'm sure it is all of these things and so much more. but in the most purest sense, it is simply because my soul is connected. i am free here. at peace. i am home.

i know that God is everywhere. of this, i am completely confident. but there is something about the ocean that quiets my soul in a different way...i seem to hear His whisper and feel His embrace on every stroke and gentle caress of the wind.

someday i will live in that place. someday i will call it home. and until then, i will treasure each and every moment i am given to visit the beauty.

“an empty shell bleached by the salt and sun of a storm-tossed sea.  
He finds you tossed upon the vastness of a windswept beach...all the half truths, every compromise, each word that spilled from lips afraid to speak the truth.... are washed to sea...and with it, the small frightened creature that hid within the darkness of her shiny shell.

she was never you...

she was not the real substance, she was not the beating heart, she was not the being who would turn that shell into something chosen, precious, treasured...something sought out and cherished, held like a jewel, used to illustrated His sacred plan, a metaphor of humility, surrender, grace... 

'i feel like an empty shell' she whispers in a voice more true than who she thought she was, and what now speaks is free of all she once filled with names, and roles, offices and addresses, titles and accomplishments... 

in the whispered voice of her sea-washed emptiness, she sings a song so sweet, and in a tone so true, that volume seems grotesque and clumsy coming from the perfect emptiness of her singular truth, her whole truth, and nothing more... 

she is singing to Him, with Him, for Him.
she is singing out from Him, from where He lives at the core of her outward curving...the reaching, growing, expanding chambers of her purest self...

and because He is so infinitely the very center of what is left...a whisper is enough...more than enough...

for an empty shell to sing...and be chosen by One who hears...” 

-K.M. Robertson

a few final phone pics from our trip.

linking up with casey  

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